To my darling daughter
You are only 6 at the moment. You love girly things – in fact if it’s pink then you pretty much want to have it. Your days are filled with playing with your ‘babies’ and cooking in your own kitchen. You would wear skirts over trousers and love to twirl around and watch your skirt fly out. You adored having long hair but are now delighted that your short hair makes you look like your adored grandmother. You are a really girly girl!
BUT..you will also happily play ‘traffic jams’ with your brother! You spend car journeys watching out of the window for planes or tanks or diggers, taking great delight in finding them first. You choose to watch Ninjago on the TV if your brother is around, and you’ll spend hours in the sandpit or climbing trees with no concern about your clothes.
I love this about you. You are your own person and you don’t even think about what others think about you – but you haven’t always been like this.
When you were in school, you felt keenly the differences between you and the other girls. I know that sometimes things are harder for you than for some of your friends. It broke my heart when you said ‘Mummy, I find it hard to say words sometimes.’ That other children made fun of you in school and made you so self conscious that you worry still about saying new words. It made me cry inside when you came home and told me that you didn’t want to watch Peppa Pig anymore because the other girls called you a baby. You couldn’t understand why they didn’t want to be friends with you. You wanted to know what you had done wrong.
The thing is, my darling daughter, you hadn’t done anything wrong. You don’t need to feel bad inside about it. You are a delightful, beautiful, funny, engaging young lady. You have to work so much harder than your school friends to learn, and when you get all of your 4 of your spellings right for the 2nd time, you should feel so proud of yourself. Ignore those girls who made fun of the fact your spellings were ‘easier’ than theirs. Ignore them when they call you ‘silly’ because your reading books are different to theirs. It doesn’t matter what they think! You are brilliant and smart and wonderful.
I know it’s easy for me to say. I know that, no matter what I say it will still hurt you inside. I know that you can’t believe me at the moment that your time will come. But I promise, with all my heart, that one day the world will see what an incredible little girl you are. Daddy and I and Little Sir already see it, as do your huge circle of family and friends.
I promise that I do understand how you feel and I will do everything I can to help you get through this. That is why you don’t go to school at the moment – that is why we do work at home. I want to give you every advantage I possibly can to ensure that you can hold your own with children of your own age.
But ultimately my lovely girl, what I want for you is to grow up proud and strong. Proud of the person you are, the person you will become and the person you want to be. I will help you to be strong enough to ignore those cruel voices, to walk away when you know something isn’t right for you and to become the most wonderful you.
I know you will do it and I will be right here by your side holding your hand the whole way. And together we will make it!
All my love, Mummy
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